在《非暴力沟通》一书中，作者卢森堡博士有次主持了一个探讨班。

In the book "Non violent Communication," the author, Dr. Luxembourg, once hosted a discussion.

在讲解了半个小时后，他停下来请学员反馈意见。

After explaining for half an hour, he stopped to ask for feedback from the students.

这时有个人举起了手，说道：“你是我们遇到过最傲慢的演讲者。”

At this moment, someone raised their hand and said, "You are the most arrogant speaker we have ever encountered."

按照以往的情况，他要么进行辩解或者立刻给予反击。

According to past circumstances, he either defended himself or immediately counterattacked.

可这次他既没有辩解也没有指责对方，而是先控制好情绪，耐心地理解为什么对方会这么说。

But this time he neither defended nor blamed the other party, but first controlled his emotions and patiently understood why the other party would say so.

经过沟通才知道，原来对方是想表达：作者所演讲的方法论在生活中的运用并不都是一帆风顺，有时也会遇到困难。

After communication, it was discovered that the other party was trying to express that the application of the methodology presented by the author in daily life is not always smooth sailing, and sometimes difficulties may arise.

本来一场即将爆发的争执，就这么巧妙避免了。

A dispute that was about to erupt was cleverly avoided.

的确，承受莫须有的指责时，情绪容易被激怒，这时我们往往很难好好沟通。

Indeed, when faced with unfounded accusations, emotions are easily provoked, making it difficult for us to communicate effectively.

但我们每天生活的场景和关系都在发生变化，如果一味采取攻击、防备的态度去解决问题，只会让情况更加复杂。

But the scenes and relationships in our daily lives are constantly changing. If we adopt an aggressive and defensive attitude to solve problems, it will only make the situation more complex.

当你在沟通中避免用暴力和攻击性语言，而是关注对方内心深处的需求和感受，往往就更容易达成有效沟通。

When you avoid using violent and aggressive language in communication and instead focus on the other person's inner needs and feelings, it is often easier to achieve effective communication.

沟通前，控制好自己情绪，是对他人最大的善良；而控制情绪后的有效沟通，才能真正解决问题。

Controlling one's emotions before communication is the greatest kindness towards others; Effective communication after controlling emotions can truly solve problems.

因此，遇到问题，先控制情绪，再寻求解决的办法，才能走出困境，化险为夷。

Therefore, when encountering problems, one should first control their emotions and then seek solutions in order to overcome difficulties and turn danger into safety.